Happy Anniversary to The Purled Ewe!

July 7th marked the one year anniversary of The Purled Ewe!  I have been in such a daze with purchasing a house, packing for our move, and other life happenings that I forgot to celebrate.  

In honor of my 1 year anniversary, I'm giving everyone 15% off an order of $20.00 or more through the end of July!  Use Coupon Code 2014Anniversary15 at checkout to get your discount.  If you are local to Dayton and want to arrange a pickup, I can give you FREE shipping too!  Just send me a message on Facebook, email, or Ravelry and I'll create a special listing for you (must be done prior to checkout for this offer!).  

Thank you for supporting my shop!  

The Purled Ewe

Picture from http://newbbc.accura.net

Insanity or Commitment?

Over a year has passed since I began working on the Beekeeper's Quilt pattern.  I made my very first hexipuff in March of 2013.  My initial goal was to just knit like crazy, and hopefully finish a quilt in a year.  I laugh at that thought now after finishing 100 hexipuffs this very morning!

For those of you asking "What is a hexipuff?" here is a picture of one.  A hexipuff is a knitted hexagon that you can stuff or leave unstuffed.  I stuff mine with 100% bamboo fill.  

Hexipuff knit with leftover Madeline Tosh yarn

Let's put this into prospective.  I have a blanket that is 50" x 70".  I layer the blanket out on the floor and placed my 100 colorful, squishy, cute hexipuffs on that blanket to see how far I have come in making a quilt.  This is what I have so far...

A quilt, I have not.  A good start, yes, but if I wanted to make a 50" by 70" quilt with my hexiupffs, I'm probably looking at knitting 800 more!  Maybe not that many, but that's how it feels!  

All lined up

I wouldn't have made it to 100 hexipuffs if it hadn't been for a friend of mine on Ravelry challenging me this week.  We wanted to see if we could make it to 100 in one week.  Both of us completed the challenge, and both of us realized how far we have to go to make something with our hexipuffs.  I'm beginning to understand why many people end up making pillows or smaller projects with hexipuffs rather than quilts.  

Gifted sock yarn turned into a colorful hexipuff

I'm so grateful to my friends and even complete strangers who have sent me their leftover sock yarn for my hexipuffs.  So many colors!  Everything from hand dyed to handspun.  

BFL sock yarn hand dyed by my friend, Beth, using Kool Aid

Being this far into the project, I'm definitely going to keep going.  800 hexipuffs, probably not, but we'll see where I am in another year.  Knitting these puffs may seem like insanity to other knitters, but to me, they are little finished objects.  When I'm getting tired of working on something bigger, I know I can pick up my hexipuff materials and make one in 40 min or less and have another hexipuff for my quilt.  They are easy to carry along with me when I'm on the go, and I can knit them from memory when I'm tired at the end of the day.  If I get bored of them, I can put them aside, work on other projects, and come back to them without having to remember where I was in a pattern or what row I finished with.  I just start a new one and finish it, so easy!  Someday, I'll have enough hexipuffs to make something bigger.  Then the task of sewing them all together will be at my finger tips, and I'll probably call "insanity" at that point.  :)  Until then, I'm committed and will keep buzzing away making hexipuffs.  

Remembering my sons today

Most people look forward to celebrating their children's 2nd birthday.  They plan parties, send out invitations, and think of decorations.  They buy gifts and think about the milestones that have happened in the past two years.  As a mother without her children, thinking of my boys' second birthday isn't a happy time for me.  I don't get to plan parties, buy gifts, or share photos of how my boys have grown.  I don't get to go onto Facebook and post videos of my family and friends singing Happy Birthday to my kids.  Instead, I sit here, remembering July 1st of 2012.  The day my world shattered.  The day time stood still.  The day I lost my precious twin sons, Liam & Colin.  

Our boys were born prematurely at 20 weeks and passed away shortly after.  We had no warning.  We were told just days before at our first ultrasound that they were doing great...growing and looking healthy.  We didn't even know there were two until that ultrasound, and it was such a shock and a joy all at once!  I wish I could think back on their birthday as a peaceful day...find some joy in it to cling to.  For me, it was a hellish, nightmare of a day that I will never forget.  No mother ever wants to think of their children's birthday in that way.

I try not to dwell on their birth and passing.  I think about the five months they were with me.  I remember finding out that I was pregnant, and how blissfully happy Chris and I were that day.  I remember hearing their heartbeats, and thinking it was magical that heartbeats could be that fast!  I remember the morning sickness that would come and go randomly throughout the days, and how I kept thinking it would pass at some point...when it lasted all the way up until the day they were born.  They traveled with me to Michigan, to Ohio, even to California.  I said "Good Morning!" to them every day and "Good Night" every night.  I remember feeling them move for the first time, like butterflies in my stomach.  I remember being the happiest pregnant woman on the planet!  Every day, I was so thankful to be pregnant after enduring three years of negative pregnancy tests and failed fertility treatments.  I remember my wonderful midwife, Michelle, and how she was always there to answer questions and to reassure me.  I remember coming to Ohio and looking at apartments with Chris and thinking of where we would all live together.  These happy memories are the things I cling to now.  They are the things I want to remember always.  Never forgetting my time with my sweet boys.

In these past two years, my husband and I have endured much, but have remained ever so close.  

There are no words to describe how much I miss my sons.  Those who have lost babies truly understand, and those who haven't, well, I'm thankful you don't understand completely.  I've been grateful for the support we have received from family, friends, and others.  

There isn't a day that passes in which I don't think about Liam & Colin and wish that they were still here with us.  

Liam & Colin Beck~ Forever in our Hearts

Larkspur--July Birth Flower